February 17, 2009

Daily meditaion thought

This is from the Courage to Change book for February 16th...it totally speaks to me today.

"We move from being at the mercy of any problem that comes along to an inner certainty that no matter what happens in our lives, we will be able to face it, deal with it and learn from it with the help of our Higher Power."

...In All Our Affairs

February 11, 2009

2 Wolves

Two Wolves

One evening an old Cherokee told his grandson about a battle that
goes on inside all people. He said, 'My son, the battle is between two
'wolves' inside us all.

One is Evil. It is anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed,
arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false
pride, superiority, and ego.

The other is Good. It is joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility,
kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his
grandfather: 'Which wolf wins?'

The old Cherokee simply replied, 'The one you feed.'

Thanks to my friend for sending this to me in an email...it is so simple yet so profound at the same time.

My grandmother died this past weekend...I got to see her on Saturday and spend the afternoon with her going in and out of consciousness. It was heartwarming to see her become alert with her son's voices as they said her name and called out to her. I couldn't help but think of when this moment will happen in my life...when my children will be by my side saying good bye to me...I can only pray that I live to be 96 like Nana Kitty did. She was not in any pain nor distress, she looked very much at peace. It was quite an honor to be witness to the end of her life. She definitely fed the good wolf!

I have not been much up to writing here lately...sorry to be quiet...maybe it's that treatment is over...maybe it's the short days of winter...maybe it's the running around after a toddler all day long...i don't quite know. I'm trying to prioritize my tasks and hug the kids more. I'm trying to be less irritable and more patient. Most days are long and I am happy to lay down at night...though it's never alone for very long.

Sara got her hair cut...oh she looks like such a big girl now...so much of her young life has been wished away...I hope I can make it up to her someday. She sits in my lap now...I need to wrap this up...but know the suport you all have given to me is cherished daily.